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Not continued from last week.

This is just one of those weeks. The ones that make you cry. That make you laugh. That cast a pall over the valley like a blimp full of chimpanzees, who hijacked a blimp and took it off, joy-riding around the countryside (well, technically above, seeing as they’re in a blimp, and blimps seem like they’d be easy enough to figure out how to get off the ground, as they’re something like 85% air, even for chimpanzees, who aren’t necessarily renowned for their blimping abilities, though I could also picture the scene where a bunch of chimpanzees are just hanging around, picking nits off each other, lounging in the sun on the rubber surface of the blimp as air slowly escapes and they’re having a relaxing afternoon until the collapsing folds of rubber winds up suffocating one of the chimps, which drives them all into a frenzy just about the time the Swedish tour bus pulls up, which doesn’t end well at all) and are flying it entirely too low for federal regulations, knocking the tops of trees and brushing utility poles with alarming force.

An especially bad week if you’re a Swedish tourist. So I say this in the nicest of possible ways, and by no means do I mean this sentiment for now and all of time: Swedes Stay Home!

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Your weekly horoscopes.

General — mhanlon.

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