Traumarama
"One day, while out for a walk, the little French poodle was viciously attacked."
"That's it? That's the news story?"
"Umm, yeah."
The guy with the clipboard and an impressive set of headgear took off the headgear. This took a couple of minutes.
"What? Was it missing something? I thought the 'viciously' was nice... or was that it? I think I ad-libbed that part. Too much?" The guy sitting in front of the bank of lights, cameras, and behind a large desk fidgeted with the papers in front of him.
But they got no further because an intern somewhere hidden by all the lights knocked over a camera and spilled the urn of coffee he had been carrying out across the floor, and four other staff were electrocuted in a manner that would be talked about in the ER for days afterwards.
disclaimer:
Well, here it is. The week. The week we've been haranguing you about for some time now. Granted, it hasn't just been this week, and we're not likely to stop... not completely, anyway, but here's the deal.
If you show up at the reading in beautiful Webster, Massachusetts on December 28th, between 5 and 7 pm, you can consider yourself personally exempted from all further haranguing in this space about the absolutely fabulous book called Fenway Fiction. Really. This is like the "Get out of jail free" card in Monopoly (tm)!
You can just sit back and not feel the slightest bit guilty when we announce that Fenway Fiction's current Amazon sales ranking is actually four spots lower than the other lowest product being offered on Amazon. Because you really contributed... but listen, it's not just that... we're not just doing all this reminding for us, you understand. You getting Fenway Fiction, or, even better, getting Fenway Fiction and attending the Wednesday night reading in Webster will directly benefit you. Now, I haven't had much time to do any tests on this sort of thing, but scientifically, I believe attending and reading the book will make you a) smarter, b) more attractive, c) smell better, d) better read, and e) able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.
It's not a bad tradeoff for a little bit of your time and cash, really.
It is also the only way you're going to get a full-on fix of Sane Magazine this week and next, as this issue, as you may have noticed, is a little curt. And next week's, which you almost certainly haven't noticed just yet, because it isn't out, is also a tad bit short. I should have mentioned that above. Consider it benefit f).
So come on down and catch up with this exciting new version of Sane Magazine, live and in person, a little bit like Disney on Ice, only I won't be wearing tights and ice skates. Not figure skates, at any rate.
See you at the races.
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