The Stones of Huilong
It's not my fault I was born short.
When I say that, of course, I mean I was born short, like everyone is, and then failed to grow up the way everyone else generally does. I guess I'm implying that my shortness was a direct result of being born, and not of any environmental causes that may have had a say in the matter post-birth. In one of the groups I attend monthly I'd be run out on a rail for saying such things; they're very into the ability of a person to change their "destiny" when their destiny is genetically coded into their being. It's a nice enough group, with an excellent spread of cookies and snacks for us to all munch on during any breaks in the conversation, which, in itself, is enough of a reason to keep attending the meetings.
I've also got a big head. Again, not my fault. And I'm not talking metaphorically. Or, umm, I suppose it's not a metaphor, but, you know, other than physically. My head is frickin' huge! It's like ten times the size of normal people's heads! Okay, all right, that's a lie. It's probably not ten times, but it's pretty large. So much so that, if I were to borrow your tshirt, there's a good chance I'd either rip the hole for my head to go through or, more likely, you'd start yelling at me to stop tugging on your shirt as I'm about to tip the neck hole!
I know I'm not painting the prettiest picture of myself in the world, but I feel it's a pretty accurate one, and I've never been one for self-aggrandizing.
So there was this visitor out once, he was sort of tall, lanky, with a very, very goofy haircut. I mean, he had loads of hair! It was falling all over the place, into his face, sticking to his neck and brow and everywhere... it was disgusting. Having a massive head, I try and keep my hair as short as possible, because if you've got a huge head and have a bad hair day, well, let's just say it's not pretty, times five. I should probably mention that, when I say I'm short, and that I've got a massive head, my tribe, as a whole, have big heads and are short. It's just the way we are. We live in a lovely little mountain range, keep to ourselves, and pronounce a lot of words funny, because we can. And when we get the occasional visitor in from what we call... well, we don't specifically call it anything, most people refer to it as "Out there." Anyway, visitors from out there usually are in a bad way, coming way up to our mountain village, and a lot of them are quite geeky looking.
So this particular geeky looking guy, he was carrying a camera... and he had something interesting to say...
To be continued... ?
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